A typical day,
waking up to wonder about life.
I don’t awaken to a desire to mow the lawn,
am not preoccupied with staining the deck,
haven’t a lot of need to define my weekend,
but figure out why?
Yes, that is a daily preoccupation.
I can fight the will to be happy better than anyone I know,
I’ve had good practice.
I’ve learned the tools of self-doubt better than
anyone who questions their efforts and skills.
Now watch tomorrow when the sun rises, I will be in a different state of mind.
I’ll smile and crack a few jokes,
I’ll put my effort into making you feel good,
because that is human condition stuff,
we are all if we remain aware, bound by our desire,
to make people laugh.
Well not everyone I suppose believes that way,
some are too preoccupied with that miserable frame of mind.
At least I am not most of the time,
but I have to be around you to feel alright with who I am.
When I find myself alone,
if I let myself,
I can travel far too distant into that mystique of sadness,
that place they tell us to walk away from,
that ‘let go of it’ place,
that forget about who I am and just go forward that place,
those are the places I like to be most of the time,
unless depression finds me there too.