What Crosses My Mind

  • Anxious Mornings

    I woke today with my wall of anxiety awaiting me. It’s a feeling that overwhelms me, some days more than others. The feeling has been with me my entire life. I remember the first time I felt some comfort in my personality, was seeing a therapist around the age of 18. My therapist gave me…

  • Twenty Years Ago

    It was around twenty years ago this last couple of months that I had my last drink. I remember telling my kids how old they both were when I chose to quit drinking. They have now spent the better part of their years with a sober dad, and I feel really good about that. I…

  • Eleven Years

    One year, still seek solace, though the smiles all around the centerpiece seem more welcoming, more genuine, who’s the real one now, everyone laughs. Year five, more celebration, no longer dragged away, suggested change, a new day, let go of previous pains, set forth with a personal gain, slowly. Year ten, a gracious reality, this…

  • Cleaning Up

    I recall just how difficult it was. Every episode, battle to rationalize, reason to do the things I did, for myself and no one else. I remember weeks of justifying why, or who, or what need I was trying to fill. Driving through my neighborhood one night, just trying to avoid the lawns, staying in…

  • Besides That

    The other day I recalled sitting in a bar drinks on the way seeing laughter afar . I would wait until the moment a fellow drinker arrived and we’d begin our lament how our lives were denied . By the pangs of society The truths we belied We wanted our liberty to arrive here we…