If sometimes I cannot complete a sentence
it doesn’t mean I won’t understand
if you are hurting
if your state of mind isn’t feeling wise,
instead driven down by whatever the wave
of a moment,
a passing fancy,
a time when all of our lives
become wrapped into that one moment,
all others depart and we are left in a sort of dream
trying desperately to define whatever it means.
© Thom Amundsen 2/2021
I remember I could believe in magical things,
the diamonds we cherished in wedding rings
On a sunny day, I could imagine I’d see forever
when rainbows appeared, I would run until never.
~
When I was a child I recall all of my scary dreams
were mysterious inventions of my fears it seems.
While happiness, security, confusion followed me,
hope, passion, optimism, confidence eluded me.
~
I remember I could look in a person’s eyes at will
without ever wondering if I might be today’s pill.
I could climb a mile of stairs in a half a minute,
turn around, run downstairs and forget I was in it.
~
When I was a child I would smile in every instance
I found if I didn’t my world became horrific intense.
I wish I’d decided as a child to let go of my notions
instead no longer might I pretend away commotions.
~
When I was a child I remember life seemed lovely mild.
A tearful demeanor didn’t determine when I was a child.
That summer
I listened, you heard
the keys of his piano
swept my life to a dream,
perhaps I was only in a wish
a hope to find peace with you
to discover how we as two
might find our one.
~
That summer
I listened, you heard
voices that beckoned
a state of mind, or affair,
desires beyond the words,
the keys that played
in my head
turned rather to pain.
~
That summer
I listened, you heard
my resilience torn away.
I stumbled alone to wait
while your world did evolve,
perhaps mirroring my dissolve.
If only then I knew the keys,
perhaps … well just
perhaps.
~
When I measure my stressors I am generally alone
Without any solace from my own personal fears
Ever really think about that?
I mean, really?
Think about that on a more personal level
Rather than maybe, perhaps, oh say,
Intellectual?
For that’s where a lot of us like to remain
Deep inside our heads where no one
No one real can step in and take away our
Mental anguish.
~
We sometimes on a spectacular day choose
Particular moods
Quiet times
Times we like to remain alone
Some times
Simply stay alone even on a sunny day
That day spilling energy for our taking
We choose to remain wrapped up forever
Struggling and wondering and struggling
To understand instead of reprimand our
Mental anguish.
~
Ever wonder what it might feel like to own
Ourselves rather than cry upon the unknown …
