Barista Poise

Life Imitates Art

If

forever lasts

would I could recall when

slow motion

crawl we caress

time

stand still

here is where I remain

a statuesque departure a

moment in posture

we

could converse

for hours no matter the hour

4AM

one time you were there when

I needed that conversation to happen

We could always count on each other

never moving

static

would we that our values

remain honest

as do our frame of mind

in plaster.

Self Worth

When my dopamine kicks in,

I’ll speak to it,

ask

where have you been all these hours ago,

well

a reply

I’ll stammer for a minute,

ask again,

the answer will remain as far away as any sense of hope might offer resolution.

What marks a new day

is the constant

that part of our reality refuses

to let our conscience forget

just who it is we might be trying to be.

When I can find myself furthest away from

trying to figure out

who I am,

that is the time,

I let the music take me away,

that’s when,

journeys begin,

I can now tell you the truth,

because there is this greater sense of release,

allows me to share ideals,

to recognize a certain

beauty

in words …

A little later on when the strength of time

wears down,

fatigue,

the insolent nature of doubt,

again begins to settle in,

hiding all the layers of diligence,

that resilient nature,

we begin to wonder,

never out loud,

where it is we might have gone,

searching for peace,

time,

we have to continue to make our trek

worthy.

Speaking in Shadows

I play a song,

a memory,

I right a wrong,

a summary,

of just what it is I am trying to do,

I watched a woman struggle today

trying to define her identity,

seemed so real, so natural, so painful,

until she in wonderful drama,

exited the wings.

I have spent the majority of my life,

playing a role,

yet, even today,

I’m still not feeling my character.

When once life was always defined by certain

stage directions,

now today, I cannot determine a stable entrance.

I can’t stand improv!

Strength in Time

I know that what I feel today,

is old habit,

been with me quite some time,

I’m used to feeling afraid,

my anxiety,

I sometimes find it to be a barometer,

yet, those are always meant to be

predictable,

even though we all realize they work

in variables.

Barometers I mean,

not emotions.

if I could design a plan would filter

the messiness, the ugly terrain,

that part of human nature, we all need to pretend away,

it doesn’t exist, we like to say,

well, anyway!

Even while I watch same routines,

an intersection in constant motion, new eyes,

new travelers all together in unison,

waiting for the next green light …

I suppose I need to learn how to better

take turns

than force my idyllic brainstorm upon anyone,

well at least those that no longer care.

There is a certain beauty in strength,

given time,

without any fear of being stripped away,

time.

A Dark Day

I’m walking in sunlight,

crisp winter morning shadows in ice,

the common vapor of cars a bit of artistry,

tangles toward a pretty blue sky.

If I might welcome that energy,

soothing to my lost soul in struggle,

feeling the hurt of a reality in place,

sort out the memory of what is good.

I can only see a sadness in expression,

weathering the chaos of confusion,

wonder with me, how do we navigate

the bullshit of ego’s human condition.

When once while laughter contained

the irony of our way of life, sometime

later we forget just how bright our eyes

could feel on a brilliant winter afternoon.

I’d like to keep things this way for today,

just breathe in the beauty of Nature’s kind.

Real Pain

I know we all understand pain,

on each level of our lives,

choices made,

outcomes that behave

in a manner of retrospect.

Tonight, there is a horrific sadness

when reflection decides upon

a reality we wish to comprehend.

Confusion speaks out loud,

long after acceptance.

A shadow of our lives will always

stand nearby

waiting with open arms to envelop

our pride, when standing at the gauntlet,

we acknowledge our vulnerability.

~

I want to be strong, I want to remember,

I want to remain open, I want to surrender.

I wish to breathe again.

Please, forgive me as I stand here in pain.

~

Though it is real, one can never imagine the same.